Monday, September 7, 2009

the sand and the surf

Like when the sand meets the over powering surf,
I lose myself in you, as you wash over me.
All that I was is gently washed away.
The sand castle fortress are no more, as you reveal what should really be there.
You swept away the identity of who I was... or rather what I tried to build myself to be.
What I've painstakingly molded myself into from all the mud and dirt I was giving.
I want to say thank you.
Instead of being angry that all my efforts have been washed away, I'm happy that u freed me from a fortress of my own construction.....
Sometimes you have to knock down the hardness of the sand before you can realize that you were locked in, and now set free.
There is a freedom you get from yielding......
We pride ourselves on building castles out of the dirt life has given us, instead of the bigger truth..... That we build monument, and are still holding on to just that..THE DIRT....
You washed it all away...
Along with the names I have written in the sand, so i am able to write new ones... and I'll start with yours...
Beautiful forgiveness.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Jesus said we are to share in the glory, but that brought me to a question, what is the glory exactly?? Well that is an easy one, Moses asked God to see his glory pass before him, and then we realized that the glory of God was the essence of who God was, - Lord passed before him and proclaimed, “The Lord, the Lord God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and abounding in goodness and truth” (Exodus 34:6) ....... sharing in the glory of God is sharing in his nature of love.... being merciful and full of commpassion, gracious, patient, kindness, goodness, truth..... then i went further, and i read that when the woman with an issue of blood followed Jesus and touched the him of His garment, his VIRTUE shot out.... she was healed from his virtue, his very goodness.... there is power in virtue, virtue is defined as 1 a : conformity to a standard of right.. It is this standard of righteousness that we are all to be conformed to by his Spirit, and this is the power of sharing in the glory of God. The Spirit that works in us. Not to simply to pray for ourselves to be blessed, but that we might ourselves become a blessing. That is the power.... when we lose our own will and become a part of his. That's why the fruit of the Spirit is so powerful, it is the very nature of God's love in us. The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 'Fruit' is used to mean 'end product' or 'harvest', and hence the passage describes what the writer expects to observe in someone in whom the Holy Spirit has been working.




God didn't let any of samuel's wors fall to the ground, imagine us, imagine if none of our words fall to the ground, would u want that? most people are not even aware of the things they speak into their life everyday... "child, u so crazy" "no, i cant do that". would we really want none of our words to fall to the ground?... but imagine the flip side of that, if we only spoke life, blessing and curses come out of the same mouth but this should not be so.... this is a little secret, the reason y God did's let any of samuels words fall to the ground is because he only spoke the words of God.... and God's word is forever and can not fail.... God trusted samuel to speak his word.we have that same power, if we constantly spoke the word of God then none of our words would fall to the ground, that is because they are not just our words, and God's words can never fail... it's a good thing that we know what God's intentions are for us
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future... so wouldnt u want to speak that over your life?

Monday, June 15, 2009

ramble

life and death are the power of the tongue. i know the power and imporance of words..... at a young age i was blessed (yes i said blessed) with an aweful speech impediment.... i had a terrible, terrible stutter..... it was so bad that i was horrified when our car would pull up to drivethru window to order food... because i would be forced to speak to eat. i would beg to go inside so i could point at the picture, beg someone to order what i pointed at... but it kept me humble. thought me to listen, with no words, i had no agenda in the conversation so i listened, really listened to waht people were and weren't saying....... taught me to never waste my words, it made me want a voice. people dont realize how important it is until you grow up and spend half your life without one.... i was so freightend to speak, that my entire throat would close up as if someone was strangling me.... it was phyically painfull. that let me know my voice had to be important, because the devil himself was trying to keep me from using it...strangle it out of me. never underestimate how a good word in due season can change someone..........words can build you up or break you down, ask anyone who has been in an abusive relationship.... words are seeds...... the more you tend to hear something, the more you tend to believe it... u dwell on it.... then before long, you dwell in it..... if you concentrait on something too long, it tends to take root in your brain... then grow, so becareful the type of seed you plant, and the type you allow to take root in your soul. by what you plant, you can actually determain the atmosphere your life will be surrounded with... atmosphere is important, because if an atmosphere becomes predicable it turns into a climate. you cant grow an orange tree in washington because it is too cold for it to grow, no matter how hard you try, the climate is wrong.... and the more you stay in a climate, the more you get used to it. the more you adjust to it.... ask anyone who has moved to miami from a cold state, first is was awefull, hot and sweaty... but then they got used to it, adapted to it, then found it harder and harder to go back to the cold. people are like trees, and so are their fruit, the climate they are in often dictates what grows.......... so ask yourself, does the climate suit what you are looking for in life? it amazes me where some women look for their husbans and vice versa, if you met a guy who is always in the club, in vip, trying to see who is dropping it like it's hot, then why be suprized when he slides out one night or can never be found or has his phone off when memorial day rolls around..... you knew the kinda fruit it was when you picked it, you knew what climate you where in..... just like when your child hangs with nothing but dope boys..... chances are, he will become a dope boy.... if you walk with the wise, you will become wise, if you walk with fools your ways will become foolish......... ok it's 4 am so i'll finish later

(phil 4:8)
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

when u are looking for your future, u will never find it in your past

when u are looking for your future, u will never find it in your past especially when it comes to bringing your last relationship troubles into your new one... punishing the new person for what your last one did to u. taking the hurt of your last relationship out on the new one, no matter if they deserve it or not....making them guilty before innocent, being selfish and withholding kinds things u used to do because "they last one didn't deserve it" or closing yourself off. you are in the new relationship having a 3some, because u r still dating the ghost of your ex..... it's never just the 2 of u, you are still bringing the ghost of your ex along...... during every outing, in every arguement, everytime they do something to remind u of a situation, everytime an old song plays...... well that's what your actions say....Without the end one story, you can't really begin another. It becomes a sequel of your past struggles. Poisons everything else thereafter... you cant have tomorrow until u are willing to let go of yesterday...... when u are looking for your future, u will never find it in your past........ what binds us to that? (which in most cases is usually a matter of forgiveness) funny thing about forgiveness is that it doesn't free them....... it frees urself, releases you from that painfull attachment and momory that binds you to that person... u may not think so, you may have burried that seed and think you have forgotten about it, but, just cause u dont see it anymore, doesn't mean it's gone... it's simply just under the surface...... but what do all burried seeds do? ....grow roots..... if you dont up root it in forgiveness and give it away, the next thing that will happen is that u will be lost in a jungle of your own design..... and every person u look at, and date will start to taste alot like that bitter root.......... if it's not that, it is usually a hidden bondage from the spirits of doubt and fear in your life (but hey that's another blog altogether and i know peeps dont read long blogs lol).......... infact i have too many places to go with this one so i'll cut it off here b4 it gets to any real meat

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

thru the fire

dont always get mad when people throw dirt at you..... sometimes its just the soil you need to grow. it's not until most seeds have the entire earth on their shoulders, covering them up, and have that dark, dark cloud raining on them, before they can digg down and get rooted.....the next thing that happends is amazing,........ they grow!!! despit all that, at their lowest point, they grow roots and they push up. it's not over night, but keep growing, not even the very dirt throw at you can keep you down even again, it has to move out the way for growth!.... its hard to appreciate the sun until you've been in the dirt..... it take the rain AS WELL as the sun to grow... like is film, it is developed from the negatives.....in order for steele to be forged, it has to first go thru the fire.. but that fire makes it pure, so appreciate it.... then after the fire, its not over, it is pounded and pounded... hammered over and over again...... but that makes it strong, strong enough to withstand all things........ the sad part is, if you never go thru your fire, you will never be made steele. u cant run from it, u either go thru your fire now or u'll end up going thru it later..... but you have to grow. that's kinda how God works, he wants you to be made pure........ Moses had to go thru his wilderness before he could see his promise land..... but i will tell you this..... with faith, u will ALWAYS get thru, always out the dirt, always forged, always to the promise land, and like the litte seed, u will never be the same again. he grows you even while you are in the dirt.... so when the dirt come, when the storm comes, when the fire comes, say thank you! cause it is your testing grounds, and once you past your test, you will never ever be the same again. trials and tribulations bring you away from the world and closer to God. without a test there is no testimony. God will never give you what you cant bare... the trick is, dont ever try to do it on your own strength.. thankfully if we trust in Him, we'll never have to

Romans 5:3-4 "We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us. They help us learn to endure. And endurance develops strength of character in us, and character strengthens our confident expectation of salvation."

ok, now that this blog has gone in a totally differnt direction then what i meant, let me go back to the original thought pattern i was goin to make about seeds.... sowing seeds, and climate......watch out for words you use, and the seeds you plant. actually i'mma make this another blog, brb

Saturday, March 14, 2009

leaving a door cracked is not the same as closing it

leaving a door cracked is not the same as closing it, but usually that is exactly what we do in life.... a so called safety net, call it lying to ourselves, but the bottom line is that we leave ourselves with a way back in... usually to doors that REALLY need to be closed. for instance when it comes to vices and relationships...., say you have a porn addiction, you stop watching it, but u keep em in your room.... is it just in case?.... u r leaving the door cracked, it's not closed, if u really dont want it anymore, then throw it out!!.... or in relationships, u say i'm done with him or her, i wont call them anymore.... but u leave their number in your phone....for what, your are giving things a way in...they say when a door closes God opens another.... then you sit wondering why it hasn't happend, why God hasn't giving you that man or that woman you have been asking him for... it is because God can't open a door until the first one is CLOSED... and cracked is not closed... sometimes you block your own blessing, by trying to do it your way, on your terms, not God's, when u really need to just get out of the way!..... they say if u dont want the fruits of sin, stay out of the devil orchard...... most of us pride ourselves of not eating the fruit but we are still in the orchard...... still flirting with it, still fooling ourselves... this happends with people, relationships, every aspects of our lives. We are playing the hokie pokie with God, you know, one foot in, one foot out. meeting someone new but still calling causualy callin the person u were tryin to let go of.. leaving the door cracked. it's like making up the bed but not changing the sheets... it's not really clean...... that's why some people, never grow, never move forward, we are so comfortable with our lives even the misery in it, that we hold on to the familiar, even when its not healthy for us. we fool ourselves to think we r moving on or have moved on, but we wont till we let go of our safty nets, or what they really are, our anchors.....

Phl. 3:13focus on forgetting...how can one forget the things behind them with constant reminders lingering about....

Friday, January 23, 2009

not mine, but i love it

I asked God to take away my habit.
God said, No. It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up.
I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.
God said, No. His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary
I asked God to grant me patience.
God said, No. Patience is a byproduct of tribulations; it isn't granted, it is learned.
I asked God to give me happiness.
God said, No. I give you blessings; Happiness is up to you.
I asked God to spare me pain.
God said, No. Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me.
I asked God to make my spirit grow.
God said, No. You must grow on your own! , but I will prune you to make you fruitful.
I asked God for all things that I might enjoy life.
God said, No. I will give you life, so that you may enjoy all things.
I asked God to help me LOVE others, as much as He loves me.
God said...Ahhhh, finally you have the idea.
THIS DAY IS YOURS DON'T THROW IT AWAY